"Why did you do all this for me?" he asked. "I don't deserve it. I've never done anything for you." "You have been my friend," replied Charlotte. "That in itself is a tremendous thing." -Charlotte's Web
Some things you should know before becoming my friend.
1. I suck at superficial relationships. I can be nice when necessary and polite when it's called for. But being an acquaintance and being a true friend are completely different things to me. Be clear on which type of relationship you want from me, and don't expect me to bounce back and forth.
2. It takes a while to earn my trust. We all have trust issues to a degree. Mine run deeper than most, and I can't change that. Only you can decide if it's worth it to you.
3. I'm rarely an open book. People think they know me, but few actually do. I won’t let you in without some effort... That doesn't mean I'm being fake. It doesn't mean I'm pretending to be someone I'm not. It simply means, who I am at the heart and soul of it is seen only by those I've learned to trust.
4. If you lie to me, or betray my confidence, I will never forgive you. Ever.
5. I am loyal, often to a fault. I will stand with you, stand up for you and support you in any way I can. "There is nothing I would not do for those who are really my friends. I have no notion of loving people by halves, it is not my nature".
6. I enjoy being nice to people. When did this become a "fault" instead of a "virtue"? Being nice doesn't mean I'm trying to win you over. It doesn't mean I'm flirting with you. It doesn't mean I'm desperate for friends. It doesn't mean that I want something from you, or even that I want something in return. It only means that I like making people happy, and if I can do that by being nice in some way, I will. Don't take advantage of my kindness and don't take it for granted.
7. Female Friends: I have the hardest time with you. My BF once said my trust issues with women stem from a jacked up relationship with my mother, and I believe there's much truth to that. But it also stems from years of being back stabbed, talked about, put down, betrayed, lied to, and purposely hurt by women who were supposed to be my friend. "Girls compete with each other. Women empower one another"
8. Male Friends: I can't be your friend without a written and notarized "letter of permission" from your wife or current girlfriend. Been there, done that, not worth the never ending drama.
9. I expect a lot from my friends. (Or so it would seem) What I expect is for you to put the same amount of value on our friendship, and on me, as I do you. Be the kind of friend you would want in return.
10. If I'm hurting, or in need, I won't volunteer it. If you genuinely care, ask me! "Sometimes the strongest people cry behind closed doors, and fight battles no one ever knows about"
11. I'm sensitive. I have a really big heart. Once I let my guard down, I love hard and care deeply.. sometimes too much.
"The greater your capacity to love, the greater your capacity to feel pain."
12. For some people I'm not worth the effort, and that's okay!! I would much rather have an honest enemy than a fake friend.